Comforting Thoughts

This was shared by a friend right after we lost Mason. We liked it so much it was read at his service and is on the bench at Deanna Rose.

"We find comfort in knowing that our sweet baby spent his entire life in our arms and in our hearts, he has never known anything but peace and love and affection and joy.... Then the warmth of a familiar place, sleep, and nothing
more...."

Today is the 15 week mark and it just seems so surreal still. I am dreading next Friday - Mason lived for 16 weeks and now has almost been gone for 16 weeks. I am amazed at how much time has passed, at home much life has just continued to move forward without him. It's sad how much less some people ask about him. I know part of it is they don't know what to say or they are afraid they will upset me. But I feel like his short 16 weeks here with us is causing some to have forgotten him already. What's it going to be like in a year? Two years? Longer? A couple in our support group said on what would have been their daughters 1st birthday so many responded, but on her 2nd birthday they got one note outside of family. I do not want my baby to be forgotten. He will always share a birthday with Will.

I miss my sweet boy so much. I miss his smile, the way he used to sleep on my chest, the way he liked to be held looking outward while I bounced around the house. And I will always remember the smile he gave me when I got him out of the crib that morning before I left for work. So grateful for that time. My biggest regret that day was not stopping by the house to drop of the formula I'd bought at Target that morning. Had I stopped by it may have thrown off his nap and maybe he would be upstairs asleep with Will right now. I wish he was upstairs right now...I wish I could see him playing with his brothers, I wish I could see how much he liked puffs and banana chunks. I wish so much...wonder if I can find a genie in a lamp. Wish #1 Bring Mason back, Wish #2 Make sure all my boys outlive me and Wish #3 I'd want all the other angel babies returned to their families.

Caden is quite the chatterbox these days...he's hooked on saying "come back" when he really means "come here". He's stringing more and more words together everyday. I love it so much. Will is into playing more with toys. It's so cute to watch him study new toys. I love watching their minds work. So lucky to have these sweet boys.